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Today's Runes for Stephen Colbert

The Cross spread is used to plot the arc of your life and the forces acting on it. It is the most popular spread, giving a very complete view of the situation. Spirit Runes are most commonly used for questions about mysticism, spirituality, and religion.
The left rune represents an important element of the past. Fehu represents cattle the Norse symbol of wealth. This rune has some interesting implications based on the fact that cattle, unlike land, move about of their own accord. Cattle also reproduce, so this rune often speaks of wealth that renews or perpetuates itself. Wealth takes many forms, but this rune generally represents the value that is purely material or monetary in nature. Alternatively, this rune is deeply associated with Frey, and hence can be the harbinger of fertility and children.
The middle rune represents a deciding element of the present. Perth, the rune of chance and gambling has been drawn reversed. This can have many possible meanings. It could represent secrets revealed or mysteries uncovered. It could be a warning against gambling - now might not be the time to take a chance.
The top rune represents a force that works for you. Laguz is the rune representing water. Laguz is a strongly feminine rune, and like the ocean contains much power of an uncontrollable nature. Here the rune is seen in the reversed, symbolic of the ebbing tide. This may suggest power being drawn away, or may perhaps the start of a journey. Since this is a rune of sexual power, the reversal can also suggest sexual problems or dissatisfaction.
The bottom Rune represents a force that works against you. Sowelu is a strong symbol, for it represents the sun. Unlike equatorial cultures that may see the sun as a harsh and imperial force capable of causing droughts, in the cold north the sun is a purely feminine force that gives life and allows crops to grow. In dark times, this rune represents clarity of sight and the victory of good over evil. Sowelu is irreversible, as the cycles of the sun and seasons are perpetual.
The right rune represents the critical element of the future, at the core of the final outcome. Hagalaz is the rune of hail. Hail is a destructive and elemental force, so one can expect this rune to represent the disruption of one's life. In the harsh northern winter there is a halt to activity, and so delay or hindrance is frequently associated with this rune. The opposite of chaos is yet more chaos, as illustrated by the fact that this rune cannot be reversed.